Have you Lived Your Life Through Others? It’s time to step forward and live first hand!

Mirroring Others: Reflecting on a Life Lived Second-hand

Most developed societies condition and teach us to sacrifice for others and put our needs first. But I have learned that this is unnatural. We have a duty to ourselves to live fully first-hand, not through others. Ayn Rand says through her fully first-hand character Howard Roark in her book.

“I could die for you. But I couldn’t and wouldn’t live for you.”

The Fountainhead

His essence is an unswerving devotion to his thinking and judgment. He is a passionate architect and refuses to compromise to the whims of his clients. He never sacrifices his values and is always true to his true nature.

After retiring from long service, I have recently questioned the life I sacrificed to educate students. Parents, educators and societal influencers work to distract us from living first-hand. There is a conspiracy of career building, qualification-gaining, and status-enhancing through promotion, and there is little choice if you want to be accepted.

Altruism is a many-edged weapon. It can undermine our self-esteem and self-confidence so that we are projecting a very different image of ourselves in public. It distracts us from our true nature, which a professional facade covers over.

After 50 years of service to others – uncountable hours and energy expended for their benefit – which I was convinced was my vocation (originally meaning ‘calling to a God’), I am now stepping forward to live first-hand. Each day, I am repairing my soul, which I feel was broken by guilt, social responsibility, the enshrinement of mediocrity, lack of respect, and disallowance of my happiness (Happy People are free).

The Altruistic Paradox: When Self-Sacrifice Masks Self-Eradication

Many of us sacrifice ourselves because we desperately seek approval. My identity comprised a wardrobe of masks worn for different occasions and groups. The teaching profession is generally respected, so I could always be sure of having a job. Multiple layers covered my true nature to enable me to fit in.

Contrary to what we are taught to believe, selflessness is not an enviable state. It means you are living second-hand because there is no self to live. It often leads to self-neglect and resentment, which skew the delicate balance between body, mind and spirit. Ultimately, it leads to deterioration in physical and psychological health, the epidemic which is now attacking our communities.

Personal fulfilment should be at the centre of your life. If global citizens lived first-hand, we would have a population of can-do Giant of supreme confidence. We would have true happiness instead of embittered revenge, poverty, and greed.

Unmasking the Conspiracy: Work, Status, and the Workforce Creation

The conspiracy continues. The average young person will work to line other’s pockets for between 40 and 50 years. They will neglect their loved ones, bury their passions and slowly and surely lose all hope of being truly happy.

Our education systems are conveyor belts designed to churn out workers generation by generation. They are not about the individual and the way that individual learns. They teach redundant knowledge that only some can apply to time served in an hourly paid job. Nationals and governments require a workforce to generate their GDPs and compete for supremacy.

My retirement after 50 years was significant in no way. I had worked behind the scenes caring for individual students, often nurturing them to the detriment of my health and wealth. In the first six months, I realised I was in a state of shock and exhaustion, but gradually, as I recovered and peered out from under the heavy blanket, I could dispose of my masks and wake up to my misspent life. Now, I am fully awake and actively living first-hand. I intend to become a millionaire in the next 18 months!

Rediscovering the Self: The Journey to Releasing My Authentic Nature

We must redefine personal success entirely and divorce it from professional/public paradigms. Retirement is a release from a suffocating prison of sacrifice and a perfect opportunity to stop all sacrificing and put myself first. From now on, I will define success for myself.

I am fortunate in my inner resources as a writer and spiritual training. Through Mindfulness (inner and full awareness) and Meditation (focusing or clearing your mind using a combination of physical and mental techniques), I have always kept in touch with my true nature, so I do not have to start from scratch like others. And my mission is to help others to recover from prison life.

Insights through Meditation tell me there is no past and the future is a mirage. We can only find reality in the moment. I can quickly offload the past and be thankful that I did not indoctrinate my students but provided them with skills and resources to live independently, hopefully first-hand. I aspire to live first-hand and help others do the same from 2023 onwards.

Elevating Dreams: Stepping into the Foreground After Years Backstage

The transition from supporter backstage to leader bathed in the limelight presents no problems to me. The world can be better if I use my creative power and self-belief. I want to revolutionise the notion of traditional education completely. My goals and dreams are vivid, and as a first-hander, I can make them come true.

If we live through others, always sacrificing our true nature, what can we expect except inertia? Another character of the second-handers living totally through other people in The Fountainhead, Ellsworth Toohey, says,

“Artistic value is achieved collectively by each man subordinating himself to the standards of the majority.”

The Fountainhead

One man or woman can only identify and achieve their value in the world alone. Our superlative power within us can generate money, so I intend to attract unlimited amounts to make the world a better place. I dedicate this website to individuals cruising the Internet to build wealth and happiness intentionally, and there is enough for everyone if we are correctly motivated.

Crafting a Life of Value: Consciously Cultivating the Earth with Our Ideals

Humans should dedicate themselves to reshaping the Earth in the image of their personal values. There are three cardinal values, according to Ayn Rand:

Reason – creates the virtues of rationality, productiveness and pride in what we produce.

Purpose – our motivation for existing

Self-Esteem – our supreme confidence to act in the world.

To identify these values and live by them, we must keep firmly in touch with our inner self, our indestructible diamond within, the unique spirit we come into the world with. Mindfulness and Meditation do not need to connect with gods or supernatural powers. They are practical ways to side-step indoctrination, professional imprisonment and mental health problems. They have been my anchor during the storm of social bombardment.

Creativity is transformative. Grasping your original ideas and executing them generates self-confidence and adaptability. It calls on the highest attributes of your character. Happiness should be every individual’s first goal, and what is better than using personal achievement to engender happiness and self-fulfilment?

This article is the foundation of this site. I will delve more deeply into all the concepts I mention in future writings. Through interviews and other testaments, I will also relate the first-hand living experiences of several millionaires and multi-millionaires.